Redeeming Dates

I have this thing about dates.  As in, days on the calendar kind of dates.

I remember birthdays, anniversaries, and other "important" dates easily.

Most of the time, this is a good thing.  Sometimes it's a hard thing.

Dates that have good times and memories associated with them are fantastic to remember.

But then there's the other kind of dates.  The dates seared in my mind because they weren't so happy.  And sometimes I don't know how I'm going handle that date until I'm there.

Sometimes I wish my brain wasn't so good at remembering dates.  There are some dates that I wish I could wipe the significance of out of my mind.  Sometimes I just want to enjoy a day without thinking about the significance of the date.  I may be far past the hurt that happened, but every time the date rolls around, I know what it signifies.

Today's one of those days.  One of those days where the date has some previous hurt attached to it.  And I'm doing okay.  But part of me wishes this day didn't hold any significance... that nothing would trigger when I look at the calendar.

But that's not the case.

I do remember the date.  And I remember the hurt.  And I remember the pain of that day two years ago.

But God's teaching me something.

He's reminding me that I don't live there anymore.

He's reminding me of the healing that he's done in my life since then.

He's reminding me of the laughter I've shared since then.

He's reminding me that he is the redeemer of my days.

Two years ago, I wouldn't have thought that was possible.  But now?

Now I know.

I know God heals.

I know God redeems.

I know God has a plan and a purpose for everything.

I know God loves to hear me laugh.

And I know he has redeemed this date.  This date is no longer one that signals pain, hurt, and heartache, but is instead a date that reminds me of true friendship, laughter, healing, and God's promises and care.

"This is what the Lord says— your Redeemer, the Holy One of Israel: “I am the Lord your God, who teaches you what is good for you and leads you along the paths you should follow." Isaiah 48:17

25

Tomorrow is my 26th birthday.

Though if you ask the waitress at our favorite local restaurant, I look 15.  And if you ask her mom, the owner, I look about 20.

I think it's funny.

But with tomorrow being my 26th birthday, I've decided to take some time and reflect on this last night of being 25.  And I've chosen to do that with all of you.

25 was a fabulous year in many ways.  It started off with a birthday trip to Greenfield Village, a home inspection, church, and dinner with some great friends who are so dear to my heart.

God was bringing me out of a year that, while filled with good times and healing, was also incredibly difficult.

And 25 was a year where God continued to heal my heart.  It's been a year that's just been good.  Fun.  Joy-filled.

Yes, there have still been days that have been full of frustration and annoyances, but looking back, it's been a year of blessings.

Material blessings: a new house, stuff for the house, Orlando vacation, and more.

Physical blessings: almost 20 lbs. lost, less headaches as I've starting cutting out processed foods, better health in general.

Relationship blessings: friends that are more like family, coworkers who are more like family, new friends, old friends, trips to see friends.

Spiritual blessings: growing closer to Jesus, letting God show me who he created me to be, talking with friends about Jesus, about what Jesus is doing in my life, about what he is or could be doing in their lives, watching people grow closer to Jesus... even if they don't always realize that they're getting closer to Jesus.

25 has been a good year.  Lots of good memories.  Lots of joyous laughter.  Lots of being who God made me to be.  Lots of life lived fully.

I can only imagine what 26 will bring.

Healthier Me

Six months ago, it felt like my heart was breaking.  Instead, through a long process of healing and drawing close to Jesus, I'm healthier than I've ever been (and I'm not talking about just physically).  So today, on what had the potential to be a very hard day for a number of reasons, I can be thankful and say:

• I am healthier spiritually.  I am closer to Jesus than I've ever been and, while I know that I still have a long way to go in my faith walk, I'm moving closer instead of farther away.  I am continually amazed by all God is teaching me and the way he shows his love to me.  Like last night, when I was reading my devotional and this verse was the verse for that day: 

Song of Songs 1:15 

Look at you! You are beautiful, my true love!

    Look at you! You are so beautiful! 

So good.  Jesus knows me so well.

• I am healthier emotionally. The word joy has found its way back into my vocabulary.  I LOVE life right now. Before, I think I was sad all of the time and didn't even really realize it.  Now I know what joy is.  I know how good it is to laugh.  I still cry, but I'll always cry because I'm sad, or happy, or embarrassed, or moved, or angry, or any other emotion that you can think of.  

• I am healthier physically.  I love the gym right now.  Not only do I get to listen to some of my favorite music which translates into I get to spend some time just worshiping Jesus, but I also feel better.  I have more energy.  I have more endurance.

• I am more me.  I like me.  I like that I'm growing closer to Jesus.  I like that I like to work out.  I like that I can cry at the drop of a hat.

I am thankful today.  Thankful that I'm a healthier person that I was six months ago.  Thankful that I love Jesus and He loves me.  Thankful for friends and family who have stuck with me and pushed me and loved on me and supported me and believed in me even when I wasn't sure I believed in myself.

Six months is a long time.  Six months is a short time.  But six months with Jesus healing your heart is the best time.