Burdens....

So tonight I went and saw a play at Bethany Baptist Church called "Baggage Claim". It was about how we carry so much baggage (a.k.a. sin) around with us and how Jesus has already offered to take it by his death on the cross if we would just give it to him.

How true this is! How many times have I found myself carrying around fear, worry, pride, or one of many other sins? It always weighs me down and tires me out. As I was sitting there watching the play and feeling rather convicted about how often I refuse to give Jesus my baggage, because after all... it's mine. A song and the scripture that part of that song is based on popped into my head and heart. Here's the scripture:

Matthew 11:29-30 (New Living Translation)
29 Take my yoke upon you. Let me teach you, because I am humble and gentle at heart, and you will find rest for your souls. 30 For my yoke is easy to bear, and the burden I give you is light.”

Jesus gives us a burden to bear, but it's one of humility and gentleness, one that gives rest and life instead of taking it. Why? Because his "yoke is easy... and the burden... is light." I think it's because he's carrying it and I'm not... he's got all the problems and I've got his grace, mercy, love, forgiveness, peace, etc. That's my burden to carry.

So now the song I have had stuck in my head (pretty sure God put it there)...notice the bridge (I'll bold it and italicize it for you):

Greater

By New Life Worship

Find rest my soul
Confess you're weary
Surrender all
Embrace your healing

I will cast my cares
You have always cared

You have always cared
You are greater
Greater than the fight
That rages for my life
I have found my rest is in
You are brighter
Breaking through the night
Lighting up my sight
I have seen my rest is in You

Find hope my soul
You know He's with you
My Savior, God
Still I will praise you

I will cast my cares
You have always cared

His yoke is easy
His burden is light
I have decided
I'm gonna fix my eyes
On the perfector
The author of my faith
Jesus Christ

You are greater
Greater than the fight
That rages for my life
I have found my rest is in
You are brighter
Breaking through the night
Lighting up my sight
I have seen my rest is in You
---------------------------------

When we fix our eyes on Jesus, our yokes and burdens become light.

So, who's with me for letting Jesus carrying our baggage and us carrying his mercies that are new every morning?

Overwheming....

Yesterday I was feeling very overwhelmed with all that I have to do... especially after I found out that I have to spend 10-12 hours a week in my field placement for 2 credit hours. I was really frustrated and on the verge of tears almost all day. So when I went in to some time alone with God, I just started pouring this out to him. Just telling him all about it made me feel somewhat better, but some of the frustration was still there. FYI I love having a God who cares about every single detail of my life... even the ones that others might view as unimportant, HE cares!! How cool is that! Anyways, back to what I was saying before... I then opened up my Bible asking God to just direct me to what I needed to read since I'm kinda between having a specific reading. He directed me to Luke 8:22-25. That happens to be the story about Jesus calming the winds and the waves. I thought it was just so cool that God directed me to that scripture because I felt like I was just in the midst of an all out storm... I was feeling completely overwhelmed. God just reminded me that he has the power over weather and nature and how much more he has the power over my life and my circumstances. Sometimes (or most of the time) it feels like I just have such little faith that God really is in charge. I'm still somewhat stressed about all that I have to do, but I know that God is in charge and can handle anything that comes my way.

As I was typing this I remembered a song along the same themes:

All who sail the sea of faith
Find out before too long
How quickly blue skies can grow dark
And gentle winds grow strong
Suddenly fear is like white water
Pounding on the soul
Still we sail on knowing
That our Lord is in control

Sometimes He calms the storm
With a whispered peace be still
He can settle any sea
But it doesn't mean He will
Sometimes He holds us close
And lets the wind and waves go wild
Sometimes He calms the storm
And other times He calms His child

He has a reason for each trial
That we pass through in life
And though we're shaken
We cannot be pulled apart from Christ
No matter how the driving rain beats down
On those who hold to faith
A heart of trust will always


Sometimes He calms the storm
With a whispered peace be still
He can settle any sea
But it doesn't mean He will
Sometimes He holds us close
And lets the wind and waves go wild
Sometimes He calms the storm
And other times He calms His child

Outpouring of God...

I want to blog, but I don't know what to blog about. I am just experiencing such an outpouring of God right now... Tonight was one of the last Wednesday nights I'll be able to be at LifeBuilders for awhile. It makes me a little sad thinking that it will be several weeks (possibly even months depending on school) before I see my dear friends again. But tonight was special. Tonight God's presence was so real in that building. I think some of my favorite times are when we take time just to share what God is doing in our lives, to pray for each other, and to just share life together. That's what real community is. Frankly, the last couple of days I've been crabby for no particular reason, then when I get to LifeBuilders tonight Matt asks if I know a certain song. This song happens to be one of my favorite songs (Desert Song... I've blogged on it before) and I got to sing it and share it with my LB family. That song does something to my heart every time I sing/hear it. Look up the lyrics... they're probably just a little farther down on the page. Anyway, basically what I wanted to say was that God showed up tonight. He is good. He is on his throne. His name is I Am and mine is I am not. He is God and for simply that fact I will worship, I will sing, I will bring praise.

Thank you Jesus!

Stirred Hearts...

Warning: This post might not make sense. I hope it does, but who knows!

Last Thursday I was really fighting a spirit of depression. I was pretty much a complete mess. I didn't want to do anything, see anyone, or go anywhere. After a little while I sat down to do my homework for a Bible study I'm in on the book of Esther. (Beth Moore's Esther: It's tough being a woman). I was doing the first day's work and was really just praying and begging God for some word, some truth to be spoken into my life. One of the passages we had to read was from Ezra to get a little background information for the study. As I was reading in Ezra 1, I came across verse 5 and the first few words stopped me in my tracks: "Then God stirred the hearts..." Part of my frustration and depression lately has stemmed from feeling like I'm out of place, like I'm not where I'm supposed to be, only I don't know where I'm supposed to be. That verse made me think of a couple of things I'd like to share.

1. "Then..." God didn't stir right away. Other things had to happen first. God doesn't move on our time, he moves in his.

2. "...God..." It was God who did the stirring. It wasn't the people. It wasn't some crazy emotion that often seems to get the best of us. It was God.

3. "... stirred..." God moved. His Spirit prompted action. God gave direction.

4. "...the..." The is a specific adjective. He didn't stir some hearts, he didn't stir random hearts, he stirred specific hearts that he had chosen.

5. "...hearts..." More than one. God moved in his people not just a person. He moved the community to do (or to go as we find later in the verse) and he moved them from the center of their being, their hearts.

I think what hit me the most was that God stirred their hearts and God can (and will) stir mine as well. But it will be in his time, in his way. He will do the stirring, in his community, in the deepest part of our beings. God will stir us. He will stir us to go... and then he will tell us where.

One of my prayers this week has been that when God stirs my heart, I'll be paying attention and that I won't let my heart be stirred by what I think I want. I don't want my emotions or other people to cause my heart to stir: I want God to move my heart in his ways, in his time, and with his people around me.

Aching Heart

My heart is aching a bit right now. Tonight is the last night of VBS at LifeBuilders and I'm not ready for it to end. I'm not ready to say good bye to all my little boys that stole my heart the first day of VBS. I've already cried about it this morning during some time that I spent in prayer. God is reminding me that it's not good bye forever and that he is in charge of these kids lives and I'm not. God willing I'll see a lot of them in the fall for KidBuilders. Still my heart is breaking and I don't know that I'll make it through the night without shedding some tears. Even so, my prayer is that all my boys leave tonight knowing Jesus and having a relationship with him. Tonight is the salvation message and I am so excited to see what God is going to do.

There are too many emotions running rampant in this blog... so I'm going to end it now. Please be praying for tonight.

LifeBuilder's VBS Day 1

Today was the first day of the VBS we're doing down at LifeBuilders in Detroit. It was amazing...Matt and I have the best crew ever and the kids are loving it! God is working in some amazing and awesome ways. The English language does not contain the words to express how awesome and amazing tonight was.

That's really all I wanted to say.... God is amazing, VBS is amazing, Kids loving Jesus are amazing, and the conviction that comes from listening to the story at VBS and saying "Fear Not!" a million and one times every night is amazing. God is good!

Worry...

Tonight before I went to Lighthouse I had asked God to just really convict me and stir my spirit. Well, He did. The message tonight was directed straight at my heart. The topic you ask?? That would be worry. Lately I've been struggling with worrying about the future. Who my future spouse will be... Where am I going to be in a few years life wise... Will I be a good interpreter... Will I be able to get a job....is another 4 years of school really in the mix??? Through all of this worrying, God has been speaking to my heart, plainly and rather bluntly saying...

"I'm God, you're not. I know what's best, I love you and I'll take care of you if you'll just let me. Knock it off with the obsessing of the future. Trust Me."

FYI: it's a lot easier said than done. But it was something I was working on. And then tonight happened and God just showed me how much I'm still worrying. I think the thing that hit me the most was that when we worry, we're saying to God that he can't keep his promises, that he can't be in control. We are looking at ourselves saying I'm in control... I'll handle this (which is rather stupid since worrying doesn't do any good). Worry is a sin that stems from pride. Worry is telling God that we don't trust him enough to do what he says he will do. But when we take our worries and fears to God in prayer, we are taking the focus off ourselves and admitting just how much we can't, but God can.

I'm not even doing justice to what was said tonight...So, you need to check it out for yourself by going to www.lighthousecollective.com and listening to the podcast of tonight's message... it should be up in the next couple of days.

So will you join with me in turning the focus off ourselves and onto God??