"This I command you: love one another."
Wednesday, April 14, 2010
Offering Grace...
I read something that made my heart hurt today.
Someone posted an article on Facebook about a Christian Music Artist who has come out of the closet. She's trying to reconcile her lifestyle with her faith. That in and of itself was enough to make my heart break a little, but what really made my heart hurt was what followed.
The article was on website that after people read the article they can post comments on and about the article. Reading those comments made my heart hurt. To see the hate that people proclaiming to be Christians was heartbreaking. I hate it!! Honestly, I don't agree with her lifestyle and the way that she is choosing to represent her faith. However, I have more of a problem with the arguing, hurtful comments, and misrepresentation of the Christian faith by those who leave comments on these articles.
Jesus commands us to love. How were these people's actions loving? How many people are continually turned off to Jesus because this is the "Jesus" they see?
I am by no means perfect. Trust me, I'm far from it. Yet, I hope when I fall, the Christians around me offer grace instead of condemnation, love instead of hate, and truth spoken in love instead of beating people over the head with it. And I pray that I have the same reaction to the Christians around me when they fall because I want to represent my Jesus the best way I know how: showing love, offering grace, and speaking the truth with love.
Saturday, April 10, 2010
Random Thoughts...
I want to blog, but I really don't know what to say. So I would like to share with you some random thoughts.
I love the Deaf community. Their language is beautiful and so is their culture.
My Kairos girls rock my socks (when I wear socks and even when I don't :-) They are girls that love Jesus and love each other. They are real women and I love each one of their hearts.
I am in love with the song "Our God" by Chris Tomlin. So much so that I translated it into ASL and will preform it three times this weekend. It's a great song for a group of people to sing. The lyrics repeat and it has a simple melody. And it has amazing truth in it!
I don't like movie fads. I still refuse to watch LOTR and Twilight.
I actually like to write papers and I go through withdrawal during the summer and write papers for fun.
Tuesday, March 23, 2010
Possible internship update
Just an update about what is happening with the internship/classes/I really don't know what to call it :-)
Anyways, two weeks ago I was pretty sure that this would definitely not be happening. One of the parts of the application was to have taken and passed the written portion of the NIC (National Interpreter Certification) test. I went online and paid for the test on Tuesday March 9th. What I didn't realize until I paid for it was that it could be 1-2 weeks until I could register for the exam and then an additional 2-3 days before I received my confirmation letter. This freaked me out a little since I only had a week and a half until everything had to be postmarked. I sent out a mass Facebook message to 200 of my closest Facebook friends and an email to people who don't have a Facebook for people to be praying. I received my registration information that Friday and scheduled the exam for the following Friday. I then received my confirmation letter within minutes of registering. God is AMAZING!
So on Friday, March 19th, I took my NIC Written exam and passed it! I then put everything in the mail on Saturday, March 20th (the date everything had to be postmarked by). Now I have to wait. They have until April 15th to let me know whether or not I have been accepted into the program. It's hard to believe that after all that work, now all I have to do is wait. Seriously, I think this is the hard part now.
Anyways, two weeks ago I was pretty sure that this would definitely not be happening. One of the parts of the application was to have taken and passed the written portion of the NIC (National Interpreter Certification) test. I went online and paid for the test on Tuesday March 9th. What I didn't realize until I paid for it was that it could be 1-2 weeks until I could register for the exam and then an additional 2-3 days before I received my confirmation letter. This freaked me out a little since I only had a week and a half until everything had to be postmarked. I sent out a mass Facebook message to 200 of my closest Facebook friends and an email to people who don't have a Facebook for people to be praying. I received my registration information that Friday and scheduled the exam for the following Friday. I then received my confirmation letter within minutes of registering. God is AMAZING!
So on Friday, March 19th, I took my NIC Written exam and passed it! I then put everything in the mail on Saturday, March 20th (the date everything had to be postmarked by). Now I have to wait. They have until April 15th to let me know whether or not I have been accepted into the program. It's hard to believe that after all that work, now all I have to do is wait. Seriously, I think this is the hard part now.
Sunday, February 28, 2010
Unconditional Love
Often I wonder how honest I really am with God. There are times when I stop and “edit” my prayers to God, which if I would stop and think about it, it’s really pretty silly. I mean, he is God. He does already know what I’m thinking, what I’m going through, what I just edited out.
Yet I think it’s one of the hardest things for me to do—to be honest with God. Maybe part of it is that it means I have to be honest with myself. Still I think it might have more to do with that I have a really hard time viewing God’s love as unconditional. So often I edit my prayers to make myself sound better when all I’m really doing is hiding and not letting God heal me and my brokenness. How many chances at healing have I missed because I’m too busy hiding who I really am from myself and from God (not that anything is really hidden from him anyway)?
But God’s love is unconditional. “While we were yet sinners, Christ died for our sins.” If that doesn’t scream unconditional love, then I don’t know what does. My problem isn’t believing it in my head, but rather, living like I believe it in my heart. My actions don’t demonstrate that I believe God’s love is unconditional. In fact, they often demonstrate exactly the opposite.
So, my goal is to live like I believe what I know to be true: God’s love is unconditional. Nothing I can do or say will ever change that, so honesty truly is the best policy. And, last but not least, healing can only take place when I let God heal me.
Yet I think it’s one of the hardest things for me to do—to be honest with God. Maybe part of it is that it means I have to be honest with myself. Still I think it might have more to do with that I have a really hard time viewing God’s love as unconditional. So often I edit my prayers to make myself sound better when all I’m really doing is hiding and not letting God heal me and my brokenness. How many chances at healing have I missed because I’m too busy hiding who I really am from myself and from God (not that anything is really hidden from him anyway)?
But God’s love is unconditional. “While we were yet sinners, Christ died for our sins.” If that doesn’t scream unconditional love, then I don’t know what does. My problem isn’t believing it in my head, but rather, living like I believe it in my heart. My actions don’t demonstrate that I believe God’s love is unconditional. In fact, they often demonstrate exactly the opposite.
So, my goal is to live like I believe what I know to be true: God’s love is unconditional. Nothing I can do or say will ever change that, so honesty truly is the best policy. And, last but not least, healing can only take place when I let God heal me.
Life Update
I really haven't posted in a long time, so I thought before the month of February was over I would try to fit a couple of posts in.
It's really funny. When you're graduating in May, people begin asking you, "So, what are you going to do when you graduate?" Lately my answer to that question has been, "I have no clue" and then when I get home or somewhere "safe" I vent about how much I hate that question. I really hate that question when people don't seem to like my answer. After all, I've been in college for four years... shouldn't I have it figured out by now?!?! Well, I don't... or maybe I didn't... actually, I still don't but I'm understanding more and more that I know the one who does.
About two days after I had my last major melt down on this subject, I got a text message/phone call. It was a fellow interpreter informing me of a new program that would be starting this summer in Utah to train/teach recent ITP (interpreter training program) grads to take the National Certification Exam. She thought of me immediately and got me hooked up with the contact person. A few days ago, I got all the info in the mail and now I have about three weeks to get everything down, but it's an amazing opportunity. I'm still praying about it, but even if this falls through, I'm not so worried about it. God literally dropped this in my lap, right after a major meltdown. Maybe this is an opportunity I'm supposed to take. Maybe all the doors will slam shut. Either way, I've learned and been reminded how much my God cares about me, and how much he will provide for me, and that's enough.
It's really funny. When you're graduating in May, people begin asking you, "So, what are you going to do when you graduate?" Lately my answer to that question has been, "I have no clue" and then when I get home or somewhere "safe" I vent about how much I hate that question. I really hate that question when people don't seem to like my answer. After all, I've been in college for four years... shouldn't I have it figured out by now?!?! Well, I don't... or maybe I didn't... actually, I still don't but I'm understanding more and more that I know the one who does.
About two days after I had my last major melt down on this subject, I got a text message/phone call. It was a fellow interpreter informing me of a new program that would be starting this summer in Utah to train/teach recent ITP (interpreter training program) grads to take the National Certification Exam. She thought of me immediately and got me hooked up with the contact person. A few days ago, I got all the info in the mail and now I have about three weeks to get everything down, but it's an amazing opportunity. I'm still praying about it, but even if this falls through, I'm not so worried about it. God literally dropped this in my lap, right after a major meltdown. Maybe this is an opportunity I'm supposed to take. Maybe all the doors will slam shut. Either way, I've learned and been reminded how much my God cares about me, and how much he will provide for me, and that's enough.
Friday, January 8, 2010
The future...
I graduate in four months. That is both exciting and terrifying to me. Yes I'll be excited to have a four year BA degree. But I honestly have no idea what I'm supposed to do after graduation and that is scary. I like knowing. I like having a plan. I like to-do lists. I like structure and organization. And I don't like not knowing. And now I'll be stepping into the unknown.
Part of the problem is that there are 50 million (okay maybe not that many, but certainly a lot) of things I want to do, degrees I want to have, and life change that I want to happen. Sometimes I wonder if I'm truly missing it all and I'm not supposed to do any of the things that I think I want to do and I'm supposed to do something totally different.
Yet as much as I don't know my future, I know God does. Jeremiah 29:11 says that, "I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD..." He knows. It doesn't say that I know, it says that he knows. He knows what's next. He knows whether I'll go back to school (and for which degree), he knows if I'll go on a missions trip, he knows what he has planned for me and he won't fail me. He will take care of me. He knows so I don't have to worry and fret (which is a lot easier said then done).
My life doesn't belong to me. It belongs to him. And during this time of unknowns, I'll keep seeking and searching for his presence, because no matter what I end up doing, that's where I want to be: in his presence: worshipping, loving, being.
Part of the problem is that there are 50 million (okay maybe not that many, but certainly a lot) of things I want to do, degrees I want to have, and life change that I want to happen. Sometimes I wonder if I'm truly missing it all and I'm not supposed to do any of the things that I think I want to do and I'm supposed to do something totally different.
Yet as much as I don't know my future, I know God does. Jeremiah 29:11 says that, "I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD..." He knows. It doesn't say that I know, it says that he knows. He knows what's next. He knows whether I'll go back to school (and for which degree), he knows if I'll go on a missions trip, he knows what he has planned for me and he won't fail me. He will take care of me. He knows so I don't have to worry and fret (which is a lot easier said then done).
My life doesn't belong to me. It belongs to him. And during this time of unknowns, I'll keep seeking and searching for his presence, because no matter what I end up doing, that's where I want to be: in his presence: worshipping, loving, being.
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